Attitude and Back Talk

The two things on this God blessed green earth that I can't stand. And what does 10K give me? Almost nothin but attitude, and back talk. I was (unhappily, unwillingly, etc.) forced to watch 10K over his spring break because it was mine as well. I was bitter, but tried to make the best of it. C knows I can't stand to be stuck at home all day with him since he gives me nothing but grief, but there was no alternative so I grudgingly listened, suffered, put up with, all the whining, crying fits about how I was packing and couldn't entertain him every second of the whole day. So I decide to go out on a limb. As I've mentioned before, just about any trip involving just 10K and I turns into a nightmare from which I swear up and down I'm never taking him anywhere ever ever again. (To myself of course) So on Wednesday, after 2 days of packing and dealing with the whining and crying I decided we were going to go out. So, we went downtown and went to Ikea, where he begged to get lunch so I said sure and took him out to lunch, then he wanted to go to sports authority, so I let him. When we were all done we had to go pick up the girls from their school. On the drive there 10K asks if he can stay in the car while I go in and get the girls. Now that is usually not an issue since I'm usually just running into ESS (after-school care) and grabbing them, but today I was actually going into the school and needed to speak with their teachers so I told 10K I didn't feel comfortable leaving him in the car unsupervised that long and I wanted him to come in with me. His exact works, "I'm not going in, and you can't make me!" Now if there is one thing in the world, be it spoken from woman, child or man, that I can't stand, it is those 4 words. You. Can't. Make. Me. Oh you wanna bet mister? I may be small. But I am tougher than nails. So I calmly tell him he is coming on his own volition or he will be dragged. This is where the screaming and crying start. I don't have a clue what all this is about! So I ask him. Apparently he feels that he is going to be literally, MOBBED by people wanting to talk to him. I tried to explain that no one really cares, and it doesn't matter but he wouldn't budge. We started screaming, trying to see who would win this power struggle. I was beginning to think this was utterly the silliest thing ever so I shook my head and laughed quietly to myself which sparked an outrage in 10K. The words out of his mouth? "SHUT UP! SHUT YOUR MOUTH!" Before I could even think I reached back from the front seat (oh he is lucky I'm little) and swung. I grazed his cheek with my fingertips which prompted more screaming of "DON'T HIT ME!" To which I said, "I didn't hit you, but I swear if you ever tell me to shut up again..." To which he screamed, "THEN DON'T HIT ME!" Note: We are in the school parking lot. I take a deep breath, open the car door, get out and shut it. Luckily all the cars around us were empty or I would have been so mortified... I went and sat in front of 5K's classroom. I'm half an hour early. I cried and texted C and told him I'm done. I can't handle this child any more. I can't deal with the abuse he puts out, or what he makes me want to do. I almost slapped him! I told C he needs to find someone else to watch the boy, because I am DONE. I explained what happened to C and his only response was, "Why didn't you just let him stay in car?" Not, "Honey, that's an awful situation. I'll talk to him as soon as I get home!" Nothing. So I get the girls, and get back in the car. We get to my parents house because I had to get some stuff, and I tell the girls to get out. I turn around and said to 10K, "Look, I'm sorry I called you a brat, and yelled at you, and everything else. That was disrespectful of me. I need you to treat me with respect, just like I should treat you with respect. So, I'm sorry for being disrespectful." I then informed him he could wait in the car while we all went inside my parents house. After, I drove them over to C's parents because Wednesday nights we have dinner with them. I told C's mom that 10K was grounded and needed to stay in the guest room the whole evening until church. I went to pick up C from work. It was silent for a while. I finally broke the stillness with, "I'm so sorry C, I just don't know what to do any more." And he asked what he should do, and I said I didn't care, ship him off to boot camp, ship him off to military school, just do something! And C says, oh great, you're just another person in his life that doesn't want him around. To which I replied, Well, maybe it's not us, maybe it's 10K... The conversation stopped there. C didn't say a word to 10K about his behavior. C has some deluded sense that Me, his ex-wife, my brother, my brother's girlfriend, and everyone else that comes into contact with 10K are wrong. We tell him what we see. A troubled child, a broken heart, unrequited anger, potential violence...but it all falls on deaf ears.

Quote of the day: From Lucky Number Slevin. The Rabbi says,
"The first time someone calls you a horse you punch him on the nose, the second time someone calls you a horse you call him a jerk but the third time someone calls you a horse, well then perhaps it's time to go shopping for a saddle."

Catch my drift?