Follow Through

Thank you for your comments,
I, unfortunately, can not be the one to take the skateboard. It was C who gave this rule life, and it is he who must enforce it. If he doesn't want to follow through, like the countless times before, that's his choice. That's how he is deciding to raise his son. I can hoot and holler and fight with my husband all day long over 10K and what C should and shouldn't do, but in the end what am I doing besides causing myself grief? I've told C a million times that by not following through on what he says he is giving 10K the absolute irrevocable answer of, "What you do does not matter to me and I will not punish you. Also, please never believe me again."

This is the fine line between being a step-mom and being a mom. As a mom I would most certainly have taken it upon myself to enforce whatever C says. As a step-mom, that would be overstepping my crudely drawn line in the sand. And as irritating, annoying, frustrating and twitch-inducing it can be, there will always be that line with 10K. I don't really know if C and I will ever be on the same page with him. I'm strict, C is more lenient. I don't harbor years of guilt for screwing up the first 8 years of 10K's life, C does. I feel like when we have our own child it will be fresh and we can compromise easier because it won't be an attack every time I say something about my child. I can say I don't like how our child behaved today and I'm going to ground him and C will probably just shrug and say whatever. Instead of taking it as personal attack on him. I also feel that discipline will be easier with our own child because there won't be that tremendous guilt in the way. I think we will still butt heads over his leniency and my nazi-esque strictness, but all parents butt heads now and then. Countdown till we start trying to get pregnant: 21 weeks. That's 147 days. That's so not soon enough. :)