Lying. When is it ever Not about lying?

So a few weeks ago we had this huuuge issue with lying. I mean, a blow-out to end all blow-outs. I'm looking back and for some reason am seeing nada on it...I could have sworn I wrote about it, but anyways I will now if I have not done so!

It was a Tuesday. I'm on my way home from work, and my phone rings. It's 10K's teacher. (oooh gooody.) She informs me that she is getting more and more worried about 10K moving on to middle school. (yep, join the club) She tells me that 10K did not turn in a homework assignment that was do that morning, so he got a recess detention. After recess detention, he strolls into the room with his detention sheet. Teacher looks at it and says to 10K, "This is not Mrs. Detention Lady's signature, 10K." "Yes it is." he responds. "No, it most certainly is not, and I'm going to call Mrs. DL in here right now." "Fine. Go ahead. It's her signature." he nonchalantly replied. (That's what freaked her out the most, how little he seemed to care.) So Teacher calls in Mrs. DL and says, "Mrs. DL, is this your signature?" "Why, No, Teacher, it is certainly not. In fact, you see this erasing here? I had written that 10K did not complete his detention because he did not follow the rules, and needed another detention." What does 10K say? "THATS NOT TRUE! You said I didn't have to come back!" They both looked at him like any one would look at a delusional person. I've figured out his game. If he can pit the adults against each other like he was trying to do here, the focus is no longer on him. Needless to say, it didn't work this time. He received 2 detentions for lying. I think he should have been suspended, personally. I'm all for hard punishments. So now I'm speechless on the phone with his poor teacher. I don't know what to say except, Oh, He'll be sorry. Yessiree... I hang up and go into the house. I sat in the car for the conversation because I didn't want him listening in. I casually ask him if there is anything he has to say about his teacher just calling me. "Nope." he says. I ask if there is anything he wants to tell me about what happened today. He get's this confused look like, what could I have possibly done that she wants to hear about? "Noooo...nothing happened today." I think I turned 2 shades darker than maroon. "Get. In. Your. Room. We will talk about this later." I call C. I tell him whats happened. I say 10K should be grounded for life. At least a week. C has never grounded him for more than a day before. I'm pacing until C gets home. I call my mom. I don't know what to do with this child for whom lying is like breathing. She agrees. Life sentance. C gets home, and I demand he be punished more than a day. I won't be able to control my anger if he gets away with this. We agree on a week. I say he shouldn't be able to go to his camp that weekend even if it was all paid for. He says we will talk about that. We sit down with 10K. He glares at us. We tell him what the teacher said, and what does he do? He tries to deny it! C jumps all over that and tells 10K he's grounded. Done. He then tells him that if he lies again, his skateboard, his most precious belonging in the whole world, will be donated to the Good Will. Another child will benefit from him lying. His allowance is suspended and he has lost all trust. I'm proud. My husband finally stood up to the 10 year old. The next few days are hard, and every day C and I bicker more and more. C wants to let him off for good behavior! What?!?!?! Letting a child off being grounded before the sentence is served is just as bad as no punishment at all! We argued over camp that weekend. C's parents had paid for it, and they would not get their money back. It was also a church camp and hopefully it might do some good in his heart, so we finally decided to let him go. The Monday after camp he is supposed to be grounded. C and I get in an all out fight over it! Dude, just ONE MORE DAY. Tuesday I'm so over it. C lets 10K come out of his room, but he can't go play. Whatever. We were happy it was over, C and I stopped arguing.

Fastforward to last night. I'm doing laundry and C comes up to help me. 10K calls and says, "I finished my dinner, can I have some little sausages now?" C says sure. We get home, and there is a yogurt covered spoon in the sink, sausages on the counter and I ask 10K if he ate one of my yogurts, the ones I save for school. "No." Well, I just did dishes before I left to do laundry, and the sink was empty but now there is a yogurt covered spoon in the sink, and seeing as you were the only one in the house while Dad and I did laundry, I'm just going to have to go out on a limb here and say, Yes, you did eat it. "NO I DIDN'T!" What does C say? Maybe it was your brother this morning K. What? Did no one hear what I just said? I left, to do laundry, with 0 dishes in the sink. Now there is 1 spoon in the sink. 0+1=1 last time I checked, and unless my brother swung by, threw a spoon in the sink from the window, I don't see how it could have been my brother this morning. At this point I pull out the trash can to further prove my point. Not only is there a half eaten yogurt cup, there is 10K's untouched dinner in there. I tell C that 10K threw away his dinner and C says to 10K, "You told me you finished dinner!" What does he say? "No I didn't!" C says, Yes you did. You called me, told me you finished dinner and asked for sausages. I shake my head and back out at this point. C argues with 10K and tells him he's in his room till bed. I'm disgusted with the lying. If you ate the stupid yogurt just say you ate it. If you threw away your dinner, just admit it.

The worst part? 10K's skateboard is still sitting there in his room....laughing at me. Taunting me. I so want to go throw it in the dumpster. There is no follow through in this house, and I'm so damned over it.