Monday, February 18, 2008
Crazy New Idea
C has a friend at work who is ADHD, she is in her thirties, I think, and had it so severe she got expelled from schools and fired from many jobs because she couldn't pay attention to anything. (how frustrating, right?!) She has a daughter who is about 9K's age who is also very ADHD. She discovered about 10 years ago that high doses of caffine counter effect the ADHD. She drinks red bull in the morning and afternoon and it works the same that ritalin does, it calms her down and lets her focus. She lets her daughter do the same, and it works the same on her as well. Now, C and I are debating giving this a try before we do meds. Both of us are worried about the affects taurine and caffine have on kids, but I started drinking coffee when I was 12 or 13...only a few years older thank 9K. Then again, I'm severly addicted to coffee and only 5 foot 1. *sigh* I'm gonna have to do more research on this, but it looks like maybe it could be an avenue that keeps us away from medication. We shall see...
Friday, February 15, 2008
9K and his diagnosis
Thank you Lacey for reminding me I had yet to post that! :)
9K was diagnosed by the school psychologist, who has been meeting with him weekly all year, as ADHD and ODD. Now, I was a child psych major for 2 years, but I had never heard of ODD. I don't know how I missed that, or why I didn't think there was a diagnosis for this issue, but it makes perfect sense. ODD stands for Oppositional Defiance Disorder. You can read more about it here:http://www.aacap.org/cs/root/facts_for_families/children_with_oppositional_defiant_disorder
I don't know how to put a link in. I am just not that skilled. Sorry.
It defines 9K. I should have caught this and now I feel guilty and determined to seek help for him now that I am aware. Like I said in my last post, he has his first meeting with a child/family psychologist in 2 weeks. We are addressing this issue. We are working on the diet, and we feel he is doing better at home. But of course as soon as I feel that way this happens...
I recieved this e-mail from one of his teachers today.
Dear K and C,
We have been working with 9K since we met at his IEP.
This is a ploy. I know a lot of you read that and think, "oh what attentive and caring teacher this lady is" But no. See the bold text. I know what she means. She means...PUT THIS BOY ON MEDS! I see it loud and clear. We know he struggles. And if C went in to shadow him like she was suggesting he would do just fine, be on his best behavior. It would not give us a good idea of how it's working. It might be the same if I went in, but usually he is much better behaved for his father than me, since he is still testing the waters and figuring out what he can and can't get away with. We will see. I'm going to call the teacher and see if I can come in on a thursday because I don't work and don't have classes till 2:30. *sigh*
I'm gonna go veg on the couch now and debate how much healthy choice ice cream you can eat before it's no longer a healthy choice. :)
-K
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Ahem I'm not dead.
So I know I said I would post regularly since I was back online at home, but the thing is, I have always done most of my posting at work, (aka on other peoples time) and since they decided I was spending too much time on their computers (yeah yeah whateva) they turned them off/locked them up. So I've gone 3 weeks with out even so much as LOOKING at blogger. Well muah-ha-ha they left it on today and baby is sleeping plus my homework is done so here I am. Typing away. I've missed writing so much. I've starting having angry dreams, you know the ones where you wake up and glare at the perfectly innocent party lying in bed next to you? I think it's because I've been neglecting my writing. Last night I dreamt C had scattered my neatly color-seperated laundry ALL OVER the house looking for one shirt. I mean it was everywhere. Dirty clothes everywhere. And the worst part? He didn't care! This is one of my biggest pet peves. I have between 4 and 5 laundry baskets out at all times to keep it from even touching my floor, not to mention the big one in the closet. So all together I have 3 in the closet, (one of those large seperator ones) 1 in my bathroom, 2 in my bedroom (one of me, one for C) and 1 in the kids room. That is 7 laundry baskets. I'm a nut case, I tell you. So I woke up this morning angry as a cat in bathwater glaring at him. That was when I decided I needed to get back to my writing. :)
Updates:
We had a big meeting at 9K's school with (deep breath) the principal, the school psychologist, the assistant school psychologist, the school nurse, the head of the Special Ed. department, and of course, his teacher. C, the Ex and I all came too. We squeezed into this tiny little room and sat in little bitty chairs. It was very informative but on the same level C and I got quite upset. They were all pushing for 9K to be put on meds. They argued with C and I up and down about the diet he's on and how we are holding him back by not puting him on meds. I felt like I was in 7th grade again being asked to smoke pot. The guilt trip was immense. We went home, sat down and took a deep breath and talked for about 2 hours. We think the diet is helping. We think it would help a HELL of a lot more if the Ex didn't screw it up every other weekend and on thursdays by giving him pure crap. We think the vitamens are helping. We think the consistant schedule is helping and we think the fact we put him in sports is helping. (His first soccer game was last thursday! sooooo awesome!) He has his first appointment with a child psychologist next tuesday. We are doing everything possible to keep him off meds. We had a talk with the Ex and she is going to 'try' to do the diet as well and we will see if that helps. The school people said we are running out of time and he needs meds now but C and I begged them to let us at least try this for 2 months. So we are fighting basically the whole school board and his mother to keep him from being a little drone. We are working so hard, and I feel more and more everyday like there is this big countdown clicking over his head until he gets taken in and perscribed drugs for something I KNOW we can control with out them. *sigh*
As I've mentioned since 9K has moved in with us, the Ex is now calling every night to get C to control 4K. It's rediculous. I've had it to here with this crap. I'm furious she wants to put 4K in kindergarten because it's free and she doesn't have to pay for daycare anymore. 4K has not gone to preschool. Her daycare provider does "preschool things" but it is not in the strictest sense a preschool. 4K does not know her colors, she does not know her numbers, she can't write her name, she cant' stand in line, she can't sit still during circle time, just to start the list of reasons she needs Preschool. Her daycare provider even said she's not ready. So last night I told the Ex this. She said she knows I'm trying to help but it's her decision. I replied, Her and C's, correct. But by now she should know that C's choice is what we have discussed or basically, my decision. I'm so irratated she keeps calling me because she doesn't want to talk to C. I have told her countless times it's between them mostly cause I just don't want to get in the middle. But at least this way she won't call me for a while cause now she's mad at both of us. lol...
Other than that life is busy crazy as always..I hope everyone is doing great and Happy early Valentines Day!!!
Updates:
We had a big meeting at 9K's school with (deep breath) the principal, the school psychologist, the assistant school psychologist, the school nurse, the head of the Special Ed. department, and of course, his teacher. C, the Ex and I all came too. We squeezed into this tiny little room and sat in little bitty chairs. It was very informative but on the same level C and I got quite upset. They were all pushing for 9K to be put on meds. They argued with C and I up and down about the diet he's on and how we are holding him back by not puting him on meds. I felt like I was in 7th grade again being asked to smoke pot. The guilt trip was immense. We went home, sat down and took a deep breath and talked for about 2 hours. We think the diet is helping. We think it would help a HELL of a lot more if the Ex didn't screw it up every other weekend and on thursdays by giving him pure crap. We think the vitamens are helping. We think the consistant schedule is helping and we think the fact we put him in sports is helping. (His first soccer game was last thursday! sooooo awesome!) He has his first appointment with a child psychologist next tuesday. We are doing everything possible to keep him off meds. We had a talk with the Ex and she is going to 'try' to do the diet as well and we will see if that helps. The school people said we are running out of time and he needs meds now but C and I begged them to let us at least try this for 2 months. So we are fighting basically the whole school board and his mother to keep him from being a little drone. We are working so hard, and I feel more and more everyday like there is this big countdown clicking over his head until he gets taken in and perscribed drugs for something I KNOW we can control with out them. *sigh*
As I've mentioned since 9K has moved in with us, the Ex is now calling every night to get C to control 4K. It's rediculous. I've had it to here with this crap. I'm furious she wants to put 4K in kindergarten because it's free and she doesn't have to pay for daycare anymore. 4K has not gone to preschool. Her daycare provider does "preschool things" but it is not in the strictest sense a preschool. 4K does not know her colors, she does not know her numbers, she can't write her name, she cant' stand in line, she can't sit still during circle time, just to start the list of reasons she needs Preschool. Her daycare provider even said she's not ready. So last night I told the Ex this. She said she knows I'm trying to help but it's her decision. I replied, Her and C's, correct. But by now she should know that C's choice is what we have discussed or basically, my decision. I'm so irratated she keeps calling me because she doesn't want to talk to C. I have told her countless times it's between them mostly cause I just don't want to get in the middle. But at least this way she won't call me for a while cause now she's mad at both of us. lol...
Other than that life is busy crazy as always..I hope everyone is doing great and Happy early Valentines Day!!!
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Hear Ye Hear Ye
Thank you sweet baby Jesus for finally letting me find Internet connection. We moved into a new place and the only place we could get Internet was sitting on the patio. It's cold outside. So therefore I have not been online. C found that if you set the laptop on our headboard (it's one of those long flat ones) there is Internet! yaaay!
Okay. Lots and Lots to update on.
First off, I start school today *eeeh nervous!* And I'm sad because the only classes I could get into were night classes. So Tues, Wed and Thurs night I won't be home. :( But...I'm finally back in school.
Second, 7K has upgraded to 8K since she had a birthday a few weeks ago :)
Third, 9K has been doing FANTASTIC. I repeat FANTASTIC.
Email from his teacher:
"... have noticed an improvement with 9K last week and the few days so far this week. His behavior is still a concern but his participation and effort have been better. He has been working on his multiplication tables with K and I see the improvement. He has a good understanding of division so far..."
Yeah behavior is difficult but as far as school work goes? He is DOING it. On his own! Then showing it to us! Last week we didn't have one melt down or fight about homework. He is understanding it, comprehending it, and above all, enjoying completing it! yaaay!
Also we started reading the Spiderwick series just him and I every night. We read one chapter a night and since there are 7 chapters in each book we get it done really quickly. We just finished the first book, and he is SO into it! It's so great to see him excited about reading. He can't wait to read more. He loves that the twin boys are his age and that the sister says "crap" (we told him its an older kids book so she can say that) hehehe...LOVING IT!
C and I both had birthdays...he threw me a surprise party, and it was soo much fun. I've never had one before. I love that man.
Other news: Our wedding date has been pushed back. My parents actually decided they wanted to get to know C and the kids and asked if they could have a little more time to become involved in our lives and we discussed it together and chose to acquiesce. My parents and brother and sister mean the world to me and I couldn't imagine not having them involved in my life just because I refused to move my wedding date. :) New date: 12-06-08
Well I hope everyone has been well, I will be updating regularly again since I found connection!!
Happily yours,
K
Okay. Lots and Lots to update on.
First off, I start school today *eeeh nervous!* And I'm sad because the only classes I could get into were night classes. So Tues, Wed and Thurs night I won't be home. :( But...I'm finally back in school.
Second, 7K has upgraded to 8K since she had a birthday a few weeks ago :)
Third, 9K has been doing FANTASTIC. I repeat FANTASTIC.
Email from his teacher:
"... have noticed an improvement with 9K last week and the few days so far this week. His behavior is still a concern but his participation and effort have been better. He has been working on his multiplication tables with K and I see the improvement. He has a good understanding of division so far..."
Yeah behavior is difficult but as far as school work goes? He is DOING it. On his own! Then showing it to us! Last week we didn't have one melt down or fight about homework. He is understanding it, comprehending it, and above all, enjoying completing it! yaaay!
Also we started reading the Spiderwick series just him and I every night. We read one chapter a night and since there are 7 chapters in each book we get it done really quickly. We just finished the first book, and he is SO into it! It's so great to see him excited about reading. He can't wait to read more. He loves that the twin boys are his age and that the sister says "crap" (we told him its an older kids book so she can say that) hehehe...LOVING IT!
C and I both had birthdays...he threw me a surprise party, and it was soo much fun. I've never had one before. I love that man.
Other news: Our wedding date has been pushed back. My parents actually decided they wanted to get to know C and the kids and asked if they could have a little more time to become involved in our lives and we discussed it together and chose to acquiesce. My parents and brother and sister mean the world to me and I couldn't imagine not having them involved in my life just because I refused to move my wedding date. :) New date: 12-06-08
Well I hope everyone has been well, I will be updating regularly again since I found connection!!
Happily yours,
K
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
One huge birthday party
Wow, so that was fun. I had some crazy chest/breathing thing, got better for 3 days, then got a horrible stomach virus. Yippie. :P
I am human again tho. Luckily. Oh and nothing like a good stomach virus to lose those few Christmas pounds! Thanks for the well wishes everyone. Very sweet. :)
Most exciting thing from Christmas: My gift. Yeah, yeah, watching the kids open stuff was cool, but that selfish side of me kicks in and woo-wee I love gifts.
So my major complaint in life (and I'm sure it lurks in the back of y'alls minds too) is that I don't get first anything. Not the first marriage, not the first kid, not even the first boy or girl. Nada. I must whine about it more than I thought I did, that or C knows how much it really does bother me, because he got me this beautiful silver photo album from Things Remembered and on it he had them engrave, "Our Life of Firsts Starts Here" :) Soo sweet. I swear he is the most thoughtful, and loving man I could ever want.
New mission: Take lots of pictures :) He even said he will be a willing participant, and Lord knows C hates pictures!
7K's birthday is Saturday, then mine is next Friday, the 11'th then C's is the 21'st. A whole slew of birthdays! C still gives me crap for forgetting his birthday last year.... We were barely friends! Haha...now I can't forget it. 10 years, 10 days :) His Jan 21st 1975, Mine Jan 11 1985. Awwwww....we should just have one huge birthday party...
I am human again tho. Luckily. Oh and nothing like a good stomach virus to lose those few Christmas pounds! Thanks for the well wishes everyone. Very sweet. :)
Most exciting thing from Christmas: My gift. Yeah, yeah, watching the kids open stuff was cool, but that selfish side of me kicks in and woo-wee I love gifts.
So my major complaint in life (and I'm sure it lurks in the back of y'alls minds too) is that I don't get first anything. Not the first marriage, not the first kid, not even the first boy or girl. Nada. I must whine about it more than I thought I did, that or C knows how much it really does bother me, because he got me this beautiful silver photo album from Things Remembered and on it he had them engrave, "Our Life of Firsts Starts Here" :) Soo sweet. I swear he is the most thoughtful, and loving man I could ever want.
New mission: Take lots of pictures :) He even said he will be a willing participant, and Lord knows C hates pictures!
7K's birthday is Saturday, then mine is next Friday, the 11'th then C's is the 21'st. A whole slew of birthdays! C still gives me crap for forgetting his birthday last year.... We were barely friends! Haha...now I can't forget it. 10 years, 10 days :) His Jan 21st 1975, Mine Jan 11 1985. Awwwww....we should just have one huge birthday party...
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Sickies
I have been really sick the past few weeks. I got better for about 3 days and now I'm feeling so light headed I had to have C drive me to work. I am dizzy and burning up but my feet are cold. Fan-Freakin-Tastic. :P
I'll be back with more as soon as I don't feel like the chair is getting swept out from under me.
Hope all your Christmas' were good, ours was wonderful. The kids got SO much stuff. SO SO much. lol...I was always jealous as a child of kids who got two christmas' like that...now my prespective is much different but dude, these kids do get way more than kids whose parents aren't divorced! Although it doesn't make up for the emotional pain...ever. I'm sorry if i'm rambling..I'm going to go lie down now. :P
-Poor Poor K
I'll be back with more as soon as I don't feel like the chair is getting swept out from under me.
Hope all your Christmas' were good, ours was wonderful. The kids got SO much stuff. SO SO much. lol...I was always jealous as a child of kids who got two christmas' like that...now my prespective is much different but dude, these kids do get way more than kids whose parents aren't divorced! Although it doesn't make up for the emotional pain...ever. I'm sorry if i'm rambling..I'm going to go lie down now. :P
-Poor Poor K
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Things I'm Thankful For/Step-mom's letter to santa
Since I posted my last post I've taken a few minutes to breathe deeply and think about good things. I decided to write them down.
First off, I'm thankful I have a fiance who loves me unconditionally and is able to tolerate me day in and day out.
I'm thankful for three step kids who, no matter where they wish they were, love me very much.
I'm thankful I got into my collage of choice, I just found out yesterday.
I'm thankful one of my dance students was thoughtful and brought me a gift for Christmas.
I'm thankful I can wake up in the morning and be happy to go to work, and my work is equally happy to see me.
I'm thankful I have a roof over my head, decent furniture and I live with 2 (decently) tidy guys.
I'm thankful for my grandma who talked some sense into my mom while she was visiting.
I'm thankful my parents are being more open to C and the kids.
I'm thankful C's parents are so great to me.
I'm thankful I am walking with God and have found a wonderful church.
I'm thankful I got to be there yesterday when my 9 year old sister, Princess got her ears pierced. (such a trooper!)
I'm thankful I will have a little extra money to go Christmas shopping with this week.
I'm thankful for my friends who are kind to the kids and don't try and tell me I'm crazy (believe me, I already know that.)
I'm sure there are many more things I am thankful for, but that's what came to my mind in the past 10 minutes. I feel better now. *sniff sniff*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A friend of mine posted this as a bulletin on myspace, but I thought I would steal it. :)
This is the mom version, but then I flipped a few phrases and made my own out of it below :)
Dear Santa, I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled my children on demand, visited the doctor's office more than my doctor and sold sixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree on the school playground. I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my son's red crayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years.
Here are my Christmas wishes:
I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache (in any color, except purple, which I already have) and arms that don't hurt or flap in the breeze, but are strong enough to pull my screaming child out of the candy aisle in the grocery store.
I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine somewhere.
If you're hauling big ticket items this year I'd like fingerprint resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music, a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals, and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone. On the practical side, I could use a talking doll that says, "Yes, Mommy" to boost my parental confidence, along with two kids who don't fight and three pairs of jeans that will zip all the way up without the use of power tools.
I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting "Don't eat in the living room" and "Take your hands off your brother," because my voice seems to be just out of my children's hearing range and can only be heard by the dog.
If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enough time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury of eating food warmer than room temperature without it being served in a Styrofoam container. If you don't mind, I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely. It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family.
Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is calling and my son saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think he wants his crayon back. Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the door and come in and dry off so you don't catch cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet.
Yours Always,
MOM...
P.S. One more thing...you can cancel all my requests if you can keep my children young enough to believe in Santa.
~~~~~My version~~~~~
Dear Santa, I've been a good step-mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled her children, even when they didn't want it. I've picked-up, dropped-off and bent over backwards just to spend more time with them. I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my step-daughter's red crayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years.
Here are my Christmas wishes: I'd like a thank-you, just once in a while for all the hard work that goes into raising kids that aren't mine, and perhaps you can make the ex more (human) I mean understanding. Please make her see that even though I still have my figure, not to be jealous because I've given everything else that is required of a mom to the kids but with none of small bonuses (like Mommy Christmas Presents made at school) she gets.
If you're hauling big ticket items this year I'd like fingerprint resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music, a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals, and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone.
On the practical side, I could use a talking doll that says, "Yes, K" to boost my parental confidence, along with three kids who don't fight and two large fishbowl Margarita's 'on-the-house' whenever I venture into a restaurant. I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting "I don't care what happens at your mom's house" and "Yes you have to take baths every night," because my voice seems to be just out of my step-kid's hearing range and can only be heard by the dogs.
If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for a deluxe transportation system to get them from one house to the other, or at least make her drive some of the time. If you don't mind, I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely. It would be helpful if you could coerce the children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family.
Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is calling and my step-daughter saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think she wants her crayon back. Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the door and come in and dry off so you don't catch cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet.
Yours Always,
step-MOM...
P.S. One more thing...you can cancel all my requests if you can keep these beautiful angels young enough to believe in Santa, always.
First off, I'm thankful I have a fiance who loves me unconditionally and is able to tolerate me day in and day out.
I'm thankful for three step kids who, no matter where they wish they were, love me very much.
I'm thankful I got into my collage of choice, I just found out yesterday.
I'm thankful one of my dance students was thoughtful and brought me a gift for Christmas.
I'm thankful I can wake up in the morning and be happy to go to work, and my work is equally happy to see me.
I'm thankful I have a roof over my head, decent furniture and I live with 2 (decently) tidy guys.
I'm thankful for my grandma who talked some sense into my mom while she was visiting.
I'm thankful my parents are being more open to C and the kids.
I'm thankful C's parents are so great to me.
I'm thankful I am walking with God and have found a wonderful church.
I'm thankful I got to be there yesterday when my 9 year old sister, Princess got her ears pierced. (such a trooper!)
I'm thankful I will have a little extra money to go Christmas shopping with this week.
I'm thankful for my friends who are kind to the kids and don't try and tell me I'm crazy (believe me, I already know that.)
I'm sure there are many more things I am thankful for, but that's what came to my mind in the past 10 minutes. I feel better now. *sniff sniff*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A friend of mine posted this as a bulletin on myspace, but I thought I would steal it. :)
This is the mom version, but then I flipped a few phrases and made my own out of it below :)
Dear Santa, I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled my children on demand, visited the doctor's office more than my doctor and sold sixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree on the school playground. I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my son's red crayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years.
Here are my Christmas wishes:
I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache (in any color, except purple, which I already have) and arms that don't hurt or flap in the breeze, but are strong enough to pull my screaming child out of the candy aisle in the grocery store.
I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine somewhere.
If you're hauling big ticket items this year I'd like fingerprint resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music, a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals, and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone. On the practical side, I could use a talking doll that says, "Yes, Mommy" to boost my parental confidence, along with two kids who don't fight and three pairs of jeans that will zip all the way up without the use of power tools.
I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting "Don't eat in the living room" and "Take your hands off your brother," because my voice seems to be just out of my children's hearing range and can only be heard by the dog.
If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enough time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury of eating food warmer than room temperature without it being served in a Styrofoam container. If you don't mind, I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely. It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family.
Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is calling and my son saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think he wants his crayon back. Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the door and come in and dry off so you don't catch cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet.
Yours Always,
MOM...
P.S. One more thing...you can cancel all my requests if you can keep my children young enough to believe in Santa.
~~~~~My version~~~~~
Dear Santa, I've been a good step-mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled her children, even when they didn't want it. I've picked-up, dropped-off and bent over backwards just to spend more time with them. I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my step-daughter's red crayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years.
Here are my Christmas wishes: I'd like a thank-you, just once in a while for all the hard work that goes into raising kids that aren't mine, and perhaps you can make the ex more (human) I mean understanding. Please make her see that even though I still have my figure, not to be jealous because I've given everything else that is required of a mom to the kids but with none of small bonuses (like Mommy Christmas Presents made at school) she gets.
If you're hauling big ticket items this year I'd like fingerprint resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music, a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals, and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone.
On the practical side, I could use a talking doll that says, "Yes, K" to boost my parental confidence, along with three kids who don't fight and two large fishbowl Margarita's 'on-the-house' whenever I venture into a restaurant. I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting "I don't care what happens at your mom's house" and "Yes you have to take baths every night," because my voice seems to be just out of my step-kid's hearing range and can only be heard by the dogs.
If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for a deluxe transportation system to get them from one house to the other, or at least make her drive some of the time. If you don't mind, I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely. It would be helpful if you could coerce the children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family.
Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is calling and my step-daughter saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think she wants her crayon back. Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the door and come in and dry off so you don't catch cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet.
Yours Always,
step-MOM...
P.S. One more thing...you can cancel all my requests if you can keep these beautiful angels young enough to believe in Santa, always.
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